Tomorrow marks the 9th Anniversary of when my Daddy died. He too died from Stupid cancer. He had kidney cancer, they cleared that up, but then he got lung cancer. He had a lot of problems with that – side effects from the radiation, staph infections. I was not a nurse at the time – actually, I was working for an Internet company! My poor mother had to deal with IV antibiotics and PICC lines at home! She did it very well however.
In September, we found out his cancer was back. We were told that he had “anywhere from 4-6 months to 2 years”. Pneumonia speed up the process to less than 2 months. He went into the hospital mid-October and was gone just 2 weeks later. It was very unexpected. Now, being on the “nurse side” of life, I wonder, “why didn’t any one talk to us? Why wasn’t there a case manager to help us? Why didn’t any one talk to us about Hospice???” (we thought we had to do that on our own, because no one said a thing!)
The night before he died he had a Brigham’s Hot Fudge Sundae. The day he died, he ate 3 times – not much, but he ate. His brothers and sisters came in to say goodbye. His one wish was that he would not die alone. He did not. His sisters were with him (my mom took 2 minutes to go to the restroom, my aunt Opened the door for some air, and he was gone) My sister and I were eating ice cream when he died – something I am sure he would have approved of.
His final words, given when I said “what advice do you have for Cousin Dan” were “Buy Low, Sell High”. Very good words to live by!
I think about my dad often, and I miss him. He never got to meet my husband Richard, but I know he would have loved him. When Alexander was born, I know how much he would have LOVED to have had a Grandson! I wondered how he would have reacted when he got sick. But I know that he would have been there for us every day, and done anything to help. I am sure he would have been putting on magic shows for the kids in the hospital!
After Alexander died someone said “do you think you father has given Jesus a chance at Alexander yet?” I am sure after a few days he did, but I know that Alexander is safe in his arms, having a great time fishing, golfing, and doing magic tricks!
So, tomorrow on this 9th Anniversary of his journey to Heaven, please remember him! Take a nice walk, have some ice cream, and call you Daddy if he is still alive! Tell him how much you love and appreciate him!
Here is a poem I wrote just after he died
My Daddy was one funny guy – he told the best – but yet the worst jokes in the world. Do you know how to keep a Turkey curious for 24 hours?? I’ll tell you tomorrow!
My Daddy was a kind man – he seldom had anything bad to say about anyone, and if you had something bad to say about someone he would help you find a good thing to say. He was always welcoming of new people – at work, friends at home, where ever he went.
My Daddy was magical! He would make my stuffed animals come ALIVE and they would sing and dance to me before I went to bed. He told me scary stories about the Monster of Mashpee Marsh but he told me funny tales too about Blue Eyed Princesses. He was the best magician I ever knew – he taught me magic secrets that no one else knew.
My Daddy was adventuress! He walked on hot coals, drove a race car, took helicopter rides into glaciers, and always went on crazy roller coasters with me, even when it scared him!
My Daddy was an honest man. He taught me the best was to be successful in life was to be honest first with yourself, and then with whomever you were dealing with.
My Daddy was all these things – but he was also a loving husband, a great father, a brother, an uncle, a son, and a friend. All of these things made him my Daddy. He was the best Daddy in the whole wide world!